So I spend the whole night at the Siloso Beach party and there was this booth about a reading palm master. He told me quite a number of things which makes me feel like I've lost everything on this world, lost the motivation to live(Don't worry, I'm not that stupid to suicide yet). It's just the feeling that you know a little about the future that you're so excited about the good things to happen and yet so afraid that the bad things will happen too. You get what I mean? Like the 悲喜交加. But yesterday, out of the four of us, I feel that mine was the worst. =/
Loner, me.
At the very start at one glance, the master said I'm an emo kia. Lonely and likes to do things alone. Watch movie alone. Go out alone. Shopping alone. Very much true, actually. Sometimes, I do things alone because I rather trust myself than others. It's not that I don't trust the people around me. It's just that if you can do it, why approach them? Neither am I trying to show off or what. It's just that doing it yourself, if you make any mistake, you only have yourself to blame. I seriously don't like to blame others for their mistake. It makes me feel bad and also frustrated because the mistake was made. Ok. I know. Sometimes, it has to see circumstances too. If it's like group work, I definitely have to entrust jobs to others. Of course, every time I had to access the situation, the possible problems outcome and the capability of the person I am entrusting to. Yes! Seriously accessing every time. Or you can call it analyzing. And here comes his second point about me.
A thinker who thinks too much
I seriously freaking f***ing think a lot a lot a lot! ><" He said I think too much until my chances had gone away. It applies the same for relationship. If I continue to think too much, I could easily miss my Ms Right. I agree with him. I don't seize the opportunity when it comes because all the while I've been accessing the situation. "Is it alright for me to do that?" "What would her response be like?" "What would happen next?" "Will I spoil this friendship if I do it?" By the time I finish thinking. Poof~ Gone.
I just don't want to make any mistake bah. =/ Be it work or love. Which comes to the Master's another point that I'm a perfectionist. Personally, I mean like if you analyse and realised that something bad would definitely happen. Then why bother start on it in the first place? Same goes for relationship, if certain things can't work out as friends(like consistently awkwardness and disagreement), what's more about being a couple? It'll be chaos, right? It can still continue as friends. But not as a couple.
He then points to my heart and said "But then, whoever got your heart, that person can get whatever she wants. You will make sure that the person you love, is happy"
I really hope I can trust my feelings and Just do it! But reality always stops me and say no. Perhaps I wouldn't be this way if not for what happened last year. At least not this extreme.
拿得起, 放得下
君子报仇，十年不晚 <--- I really agree with this sentence. I'm really 小气 like what the Master said. He said that no one should never mess with me or I'll make sure that the person pays me back. Yes. To that asshole, who took everything away from me in March last year, here is a warning. Never let me catch an opportunity to ruin you. Trust me. I will. You taught me politics well. I'll be sure to return you this "favour". My future job
Businessman, teacher or politics. These 3 jobs did run through my mind in the past. I would prefer teacher but I don't mind venturing into business. Ok, I admit. Going to 20 years of age, I really don't know what I want to do in the future, really. My goal right now is just getting into a local university. Then after, I'll start to think what I want to do in life. Though I think things real far, my career in future is the only thing in my mind which I didn't think far. =/
Double Happiness
At the age of 35(I'm slow because I think too much, thus, only 35 then I will succeed in life) he said, I will have a (good) turning point in life and have one of the double happiness. Either double business, double jobs or double women. Haha! Funny right? He said double women means I will have two wives xP LOL! Nah. I seriously doubt I will cheat on my future wife, provided my analysis doesn't go wrong lah. I don't know. Should I really 'just do it' or stay the way I am now, analyse before action. >< Sigh... But the chance might just slip by...
Kaypo for a good cause?
I really like to help people in anyway I can except financially. Helping people not only gives me a joy but also like a "trade". When the time I really need help, I really do hope those who I've help lend me a helping hand. Sorry for seeing it this so practical way but really I swear, to those I've ever help, I really help with my whole heart. I really mean no harm to anyone unless like mentioned above, you messed with me lah..
But then the Master told me, don't poke your nose in everyone's business. Not all but there are some people who might not like it and this might lead to having enemies. ><" True. There is one who told me in the face like that and I can fully understand that =) I will be cautious from now on then. Want my help? Bow to me first! Muahaha! Just kidding~ xD
He also mention it's good and bad. Bad in the sense that people don't like, good in the sense that it helps in my business relations. He say my relations can go international? O.o"
Anger Management
Seriously, there are lots of time I feel that I really need to control my temper. I don't really lose my cool that easily. But if I do, be prepared for the worst. =x I don't know what to say. Every time when my anger is gone, I feel utterly remorseful for what I've did when I was angry. There was twice, I cried.
Naive
I'm naive because I trust people. When one tells me something, I'll trust them word for word. Whether they're joking or playing a prank on me, it is when my analysis kicks in. Then, I'll know.
Another sad thing
I won't say the whole thing out but I was given 2 choices in life in future. Here, I want to say, I would rather my left knee is injured/crippled than the other scenario.
I seriously don't know how he knows it but my left knee is actually weaker. I don't know if it actually affects but if you notice when I walk, my right leg covers more distance than my left leg.
Finally
Now I know, it's very scary to know about your future for you may hear things which you do not want to know. Seriously, I'm scared already. I'll never go for another palm reading like this again ><"
